I've been sort of MIA for a while, oops! Here's an update on everything that has happened in the last few months and what I'm working on for this year!
I swear this life is so beautiful.
Since my last post, things in my life have gotten so crazy, but in a good way. My friends Oliver, Jonah, Caleb and I have all created this beautiful group called The Trans Support Movement. We're dedicated to working with other communities to end the stigma surrounding trans* and non-binary individuals. We're committed to living authentically, fostering an open mind, always assuming positive intent and coming from a real place within.
This movement is so very important to me, as it really allows us to make a great impact on our community here in Phoenix. The organization is doing so well and I feel like we are progressing very quickly! We've adopted a park that we help to clean once per month, as well as host community meet-ups and partner with Safe Out to host suicide prevention and awareness training for not only us as a group, but for our friends and allies too.
I am so much stronger now than I was.
Since my last post, I was able to take some time and really reflect on who I am as a person, what I want out of life, and what I am able to give others.
All of this reflection helped me to be SO much more comfortable with myself. I am currently dating someone, and she is SUCH a gem. We've been dating for about 6 months now, and it's going so great! She makes me feel "normal" and treats me so well *insert sobbing*.
Not everything is rainbows though.
While I agree that I have accepted a lot of changes in my body over the last few years, the one that seems to be getting to me the most is how my clothes fit after top surgery.
You see, it was really easy to feel like everything fit me okay when I was wearing a binder, because it was a full torso binder, that went down to my hips. That also means that it helped to hide my hips. After surgery, I gained a few pounds and it seemed like ALL of it went right to my hips and my gut. I will always be proud of my body, but such extreme differences in clothing sizes before and after are sometimes tough to process or get used to. Like everyone else, I have days where I feel like hot shit, and days where I just plain feel like shit.
I'm not sure I will ever get past that, because I know there will always be one small thing about myself that I'm not 100% happy with, but what I can tell you is that I am 100% happy to be free of that back-breaking binder.
I am coming up on 10 months post-op and every day I am thankful for being able to breath and sit up straight. Even though I've got hips for days, I wouldn't trade them for the world if it meant I had to go back into a binder.
I actually thought about that for a really long time. "What if I wore an old binder to shape my torso and hips now so my clothes fit better". I tried to put it on one day after I was healed from surgery and this wave of regret washed over me. "What the fuck are you doing" I thought. "Fuck this. You worked too hard and went through too much to hide again". I took it off and tossed it into the top of my closet, where it remains, still.
I am so happy to be able to exist in this beautiful life and share my story with others. I will try not to be so non-existent as we move through 2018, there are A LOT of exciting things coming up this year and I promise I will share them with all of you!
Don't forget to pick up your t shirt from my shop to show your support!
"TRANS IS BEAUTIFUL" Short Sleeve T-shirt
$25.00 - $30.00
In this comfortable and lightweight T-shirt, you are sure to make a statement!
• 100% combed ring-spun cotton (Heather colors contain polyester)
• Fabric weight: 4.3 oz (146 g/m2)
YOU CAN CALL ME DANISH
Writing about my life and experiences as a white, transgender, queer male.